Rose Coloured Glasses

Sometimes it's kind of heart breaking when someone pulls away from you, even if their reasons for doing so have nothing to do with you. Sometimes you pretend to yourself that you are important to that person but when it comes down to it, you realize that you don't figure into their day-to-day reality at all. Sometimes you allow yourself to think that if things were different, things would be different. You would mean more to them; they would see you. Sometimes it's hard to admit that someone you thought you might love a little bit is selfish and ordinary and somewhat egotistical. You used to think they looked at you and saw beauty but then realized that what they saw was the reflection of themselves in your eyes. You told them what they needed to hear; you gave them what they needed.

But now you think- things wouldn't be different if they were different. And you might not want them to be; because they aren't who you thought they were. They are selfish and ordinary and flawed.

It's hard to see that you too are ordinary, and sometimes selfish and very flawed.

And that seeing yourself as you really are is also heart-breaking but that you need to keep looking so you'll remember. All the time.